“Norfolk, We have a problem: A Huge Toilet Problem” - USS Gerald Ford

Crescent International

Ramadan 08, 1447 2026-02-26

Daily News Analysis

by Crescent International

The USS Gerald Ford is touted as the biggest aircraft carrier in the world.

It is supposed to project American power and other countries, especially Iran, are supposed to be scared of it.

Yet, it has a huge toilet problem.

Its 4,500 – 5,000 sailors cannot relieve themselves.

Around 650 toilets on the $13.3 billion carrier are clogged.

Reports say that sailors have to wait in line for 45 minutes to one hour to get a chance to use one of the toilets that is working.

There have been instances when sailors have been forced to defecate on the floor and then mop up their waste.

When you got to go, you got to go.

There are no two ways about it.

One has to answer the call of nature.

Sailors onboard are involved in a self-created “stink.”

Perhaps, it is America’s way of striking fear into the hearts of their enemies by spreading stench.

Last month, the US navy chief Admiral Daryl Caudle complained that deploying the USS Gerald Ford for so long would cause serious “maintenance” problems.

He was being coy.

The admiral had received complaints about plugged toilets.

They could only be repaired at port.

The Gerald Ford has been at sea for nearly eight months already and this could extend to 11 months.

The normal deployment time is six months.

Stuff gets broken and need fixing.

This can only be done at port.

The Gerald Ford is currently docked at the Greek island of Crete.

Would it be able to stay long enough to get all those toilets fixed, in addition to other maintenance issues?

If not, 4500 sailers would have to sit on the flight deck, their bottoms toward the sea, defecating all at once.

Now that would cause one hell of a stink.

No enemy, however brave, can face such stench.

They may face bullets and missiles but sh*t, that was not part of their training.

This may be the latest weapon in America’s arsenal.

When Donald Trump said America has those big beautiful ships that pack a lot of firepower, people did not realize he was talking about 4500 sailors firing simultaneously on all engines into the sea.

The USS Gerald Ford has airplane-type toilets divided into 10 zones.

The whole vacuumal zone goes down if a single loo gets clogged.

As one of their internal reports said, “To address unexpected and frequent clogging of the system, the Navy has determined that it needs to acid flush the CVN 77 and 78’s [the Ford] sewage system on a regular basis, which is an unplanned maintenance action for the entire service life of the ship. According to fleet maintenance officials, each acid flush costs about $400,000.”

As an email revealed by US state media [NPR] said, “Every day that the entire crew is present on the ship, a trouble call has been made for ship’s force personnel to repair or unclog a portion of the VCHT system, since June 2023,” reads an undated document provided by the Navy, through a Freedom of Information Act (FOIA) request.

As mentioned, the Vacuum Collection, Holding and Transfer (AKA airplane toilet) is divided into 10 zones, and the whole zone goes down at once.

According to a statement from Sixth Fleet Public Affairs Officer Tim Gorman, the carrier’s waste system is broken into 10 zones and the carrier averages “two zone cloggings per day due to foreign material induction into the system.”

Most of the clogs are “unauthorized items being flushed into the system.”

Officially, the foreign objects are identified as “t-shirt or mop heads” but some people speculate the sailors may be sh*tting bricks due to fear.

If sailors on the USS Gerald Ford are constantly worrying about relieving themselves—they can’t even wear diapers, as US troops used to do in Afghanistan—the petty war criminals have a huge problem on their hands.

Forget about the big guns and missiles they want to fire.

Their own rear guns will be firing on all cylinders, especially in a state of war when fear-induced diarhhea is a common problem.

The USS Geralad Ford symbolizes America’s decline: it is huge but is unable to provide even basic services for sailors on board.

Iran has nothing to worry about from the huge aircraft carrier as long as it is mired in its own sh*tting problem!