The Qur’an, Our Parents, and the Lost Blessing We Overlook

Zafar Bangash

Ramadan 16, 1446 2025-03-16

Daily News Analysis

by Zafar Bangash

(This Khutbah delivered by ICIT Director Zafar Bangash on Friday March 14, 2025 at the Islamic Society of York Region, has been transcribed by Muslim Mahmood).

A Timeless Guide for Life

As the blessed month of Ramadan reaches its midpoint, we find ourselves at a crossroads—an opportunity to reflect on our relationship with the Qur’an.

It was in this sacred month that Allah revealed His final guidance, a beacon for all of humanity. But as I emphasized in a previous khutbah, merely reciting the Qur’an is not enough.

We must strive to understand its teachings and, more importantly, implement them in our lives.

Islam is not just about prayer, fasting, and rituals.

It is a comprehensive way of life that governs our personal character, our relationships, and our responsibilities—especially towards those who brought us into this world: our parents.

In today’s khutbah, I want to speak directly to our youth and children, for whom these lessons hold particular urgency.

“Your Mother, Your Mother, Your Mother”

A man once approached the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) and asked, “Who is most deserving of my respect?” The Prophet (pbuh) replied, “Your mother.” The man asked again, “And then who?” The Prophet (pbuh) repeated, “Your mother.” A third time the man asked, and once again, the Prophet (pbuh) said, “Your mother.”

Only after the fourth inquiry did the Prophet (pbuh) say, “Your father.”

This hadith is not merely a statement of hierarchy but a profound reminder of the extraordinary sacrifices that mothers make.

A mother carries her child for nine months, endures immense pain during childbirth, and then nurtures her baby with unwavering love.

Yet, how quickly we forget! How often do we, as children, take our parents’ sacrifices for granted?

The Qur’an’s Command: Honor Your Parents

Allah’s directive concerning parents is not a gentle suggestion; it is a divine command.

In Surah Al-Isra [17] ayah 23, Allah decrees:

“And your Sustainer has decreed that you conform to no one except Him, and [that you] be kind and helpful to [your] parents. Should they reach old age while you are alive—one or both of them—do not say a word that will irritate or [disrespect] them, and do not raise your voice [in their presence], but speak to them in an honorable manner.” (The Ascendant Qur'an translation, by Imam Muhammad al-Asi).

Notice the power of this ayah. Allah directly links conforming to Him [not merely worshipping Him which is used in a mechanical sense] with showing kindness to parents.

There is no room for debate.

Raising one’s voice, speaking harshly, or even showing the slightest irritation—an exasperated sigh or an eye-roll—is explicitly forbidden.

Yet, how many of us are guilty of exactly that?

The Test of Old Age: When Roles Reverse

As our parents grow older, they may forget things, become physically weak, and require our patience.

I have seen this firsthand—aging parents spilling their food, struggling to recall names, their bodies slowing down.

Some children, instead of offering support, grow frustrated. “Oh, Mom, stop repeating yourself!”

“Dad, I don’t have time for this right now!”

But Allah reminds us: “And be courteous in a humble way, saying: ‘O my Sustainer! Have mercy on them as they nurtured me during my childhood’.” (TAQ: 17:24).

Think about this: When you were a child, how many sleepless nights did your parents endure because you were sick?

How many meals did they skip so you could eat first?

How many times did they walk around carrying you when you refused to sleep?

And now, when they need you, will you turn away?

Modern Distractions: Have We Forgotten Our Duties?

Today’s world is filled with distractions.

Social media, video games, and endless scrolling have consumed our attention.

Parents call their children, only to be met with indifference—“I’m busy,” “Not now, later,” or worse, complete silence.

I ask the youth: When was the last time you sat down and truly listened to your parents?

When was the last time you helped them without being asked?

Have you thanked them for all they have done?

Simple acts—helping set plates on the table, taking out the trash, or even just sitting with them in conversation—can mean the world to them.

These small gestures are not just chores; they are acts of ibadah (true submission) in the eyes of Allah.

The Loss of a Parent: A Blessing No Longer in Reach

There is a profound story about the Prophet Musa (pbuh). One day, Allah revealed to him, “Be careful how you walk upon the earth, for the one who used to make dua for you is no longer here.”

His mother had passed away.

This is a reality we all will face.

The day will come when we will no longer hear our mother’s voice calling our name, or our father’s presence in the home.

When that day arrives, will we have regrets?

Will we wish how we had spent more time with them, spoken to them more kindly, helped them more often?

If your parents are still alive, do not waste this blessing.

Cherish them while you still can.

If they have passed on, pray for them, for the Prophet (pbuh) said, “When a person dies, all their deeds end except for three: a continuing charity, knowledge that benefits others, or a righteous child who prays for them.”

Final Reflections: The True Measure of Gratitude

As we continue through Ramadan, let us reflect: Are we truly grateful for the blessings Allah has bestowed upon us?

Gratitude is not just in words but in actions.

It is how we treat those who raised us, those who sacrificed for us, those whose love for us is second only to Allah’s.

Let us make a renewed commitment:

• To speak with kindness to our parents.
• To listen to them, help them, and spend time with them.
• To pray for them daily, whether they are still with us or have returned to Allah.

May Allah grant us the wisdom to appreciate our parents before it is too late.

May He bless them with long, healthy lives, and if they have passed on, may He grant them the highest ranks in Jannah. Ameen.