Crimeans do not know what they got themselves into when they voted last month to join Russia. McDonald's has decided to close its restaurants in Crimea depriving people of satiating their cravings for a Big Mac! They are in big trouble.
New York, Crescent-online
Saturday April 05, 2014, 12:19 DST
In America’s relentless war on Russia, the people of Crimea are going to be deprived of McDonald’s as well. If they get a Mac attack, the Crimeans will not be able to go to a McDonald’s to fill their bellies with a grease-filled burger!
In order to punish Russia, McDonald’s is doing its part to make the Russians feel the pinch. They have closed McDonald’s grease joints in Crimea because the people had the temerity to vote in a referendum to join Russia. Now they must pay the price by being deprived of Big Mac.
In announcing the closure of all its restaurants in Crimea, McDonald’s said it was due to “reasons beyond our control.” McDonald’s is right: the orders have come from Langley, Virginia. After all, the trouble in Ukraine was financed by the US to the tune of $5 billion as per the revelations of Madam Victoria Nuland of the colorful language fame when she spoke about the European Union.
“The company has provided an opportunity to all employees … to transfer to any other McDonald’s restaurants in Ukraine preserving their positions, salaries and fees and paying to relocate employees and their families,” a statement from McDonald’s said.
It will teach the Crimeans a lesson for being ungrateful: no more greasy hamburgers for them.
If you do not obey our orders, we will withdraw the Big Mac. So there!